Taking Time

My life is very cyclical at times. I hate when people ask things like "If you were an animal, what animal would you be?" I don't think I'd be animal. I'd rather be some kind of phase of nature.

Sometimes I'm out and raging like a storm in my world, fighting against this that and what ever opposition comes my way. (today I got my parking ticket reduced to $20.00) I bet everyone feels the rain in their lives from time to time, beating them down. (literally - it has been raining for 24 hours here) These are really rare phases that usually pass quickly.

Is it possible to get a crush injury without actually feeling pain? I bet anyone with a broken heart would check "Yes" on that survey.

Other times I'm like a calm night with a breeze.

A calm night is almost an ominous thing to me. Like a heavy and foreboding weight. I love the breeze. Isn't that where the important news comes from? Don't sailors, cowboys and medicine men look to the wind for wisdom? Or was that the sky... (in movies anyway?)

There should be at least a light breeze to keep a person moving in whatever season or phase of life.

Feeling like a spring day is always awesome. Who doesn't like flirting and feeling frisky? I tend to sing unconsciously when I'm feeling springy. It's a family trait. Many of us do it and most of us don't know or realize when we're doing it. How cliche... but, whenever my brother fell for a girl we always knew - because he'd come home singing. I suppose I do that to.

Lately I've been feeling wanderlust. Which, I know is not a phase or force of nature, but it pulls on me like it should be. Have you ever abandoned your home for the sofa's of friends and family? I do yearly, sometimes for weeks at a time. I have no clue if that's considered normal or not but I really don't care. When I start feeling like this I need to leave so I can come back with perspective. Living (squatting) on the generosity of friends is also a good remedy after hibernation. A state that I also frequent. After you don't talk to people for a bit, it's nice to reconnect. I enjoy packing up my supplies and settling in my house for extended periods of time just as much as packing up and settling into other people's homes for extended periods of time.

Being extremely antisocial and choosing cable TV and mixed tapes over the sound of real live living people is centering. I'm happy and I really don't have a "sad" phase, but sometimes I feel I need to explain my behavior to people who don't seem to go through phases. I did this recently and had a funny response. One of my friends brought it up. I'd been hibernating and she said "You go through these phases." and laughed. I felt comforted that she'd seen this for years and automatically accepted it as part and parcel of being friends with me.

I've been taking a class lately that centers on behaviors (among other things) and couldn't help but think about how people interpret my behaviors since the discussion last week was "How do WE interpret other people's behavior?"

Any rate, I need to sleep now because I'm going through a no sleeping phase and I need to change that before I start missing work and get into an unemployed phase.

Spring is creeping into my wanderlust, I may not post much this weekend. I'm taking a little holiday from my house. I might be out flirting in your neighborhood using your sofa as base camp. (Interpret that as you wish)

See you soon!
Rockets